Touch How important is it? How long can we survive without human contact? Can we survive without human contact? What is the first thing we want to do when we see another person in pain, any kind of pain? Do we not want to reach out and make it all better by touching them. A hand on the shoulder, a pat on the back, a hug. We all do it.
My question is what does it mean to not only the person touching but also the person being touched! My guess is it is not the same for both. I rarely will touch someone I serve but Once in a while I will. I always ask permission before I do and if they say no then I don't. Sometimes the reason for touching is unclear, is for me or for them?
So what is the deal with touching? One never knows what a touch will mean from one minute to the next that is why I rarely will touch. I work with young girls who have had some physical abuse in their lives and I don't want to become someone who inadvertly re-traumatized them by any kind of physical contact.
Yet physical human contact is so important.........Here then is my quandary. To touch or not to touch. For now, that is the question!
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2 comments:
You address an interesting issue about who, in the end, actually benefits from each act of human touch. I know that I have on occasion shown physical affection via a hig or some other seemingly innocent gesture toward a friend or acquaintance, not because I thought that person wanted to be touched but because I needed some sort of human contact myself!
With respect to the young women we work with who, as you mentioned, have histories of trauma, it becomes even more difficult when deciding whether supporting them in a physical manner during their time of need is a risk worth taking. I am frightened by the possibility that, in just holding a hand, offering a pat on the back, or helping someone to stand up may not have the desired effect. And when I ponder how much trepidation can arise following such a small act of support, I become very angry at those persons who traumatized these girls to begin with!
i agree that there is so much more to think about and talk about when it comes to touch
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