Crisis is the Norm

We in Need

2009-03-26T18:08:00.004+01:00

This blog is an outlet for me when things become out of control at work. Oh Yes, things are out of control as never before. My co-workers are being injured almost every day and management seems to think that it is part of the job. Part of the job my ass! Nobody should be hit, kicked or in any other way be hurt no matter what their job is. Just because we work where we do does not mean we expect to be hurt by those we are charged to care for! Are We not human? Do we not have feeling? Do we not have the right to work in a safe environment? Is it not managements duty to provide that safe environment?
We are union workers and we will not stand by as our Union brothers and sisters are being assaulted.

time goes by

2008-10-29T03:36:00.002+01:00

I am sorry to say that it has been so long since my last post. My attention is being pulled in so many directions that there are times I don't know which way is up! I will try and post more often.
Work is once again out of control. We do our best to make sure that everyone is safe but I feel we are swimming against the current so we seem to be just keeping our heads above the water. I feel a battle is about to erupt between the union and management. All indications point to a battle on so many fronts. People batten down the hatches and full speed ahead.

I'm for Hillary in 2008

2008-04-23T23:04:00.003+02:00

With a victory in the keystone state, Hillary just keeps on going down the road to the white house! I believe she will be ready not only on day one but from the very first second she takes Office. Forget race , gender and all the rest of the noise, when all is said and done the only choice for me is Hillary.

Hello

2008-04-11T00:01:00.000+02:00

It seems like I have been away from this page for a very long time. My life has been stressed in the last few months to the point of feeling overwhelmed! Things in my life are still stressed but I think writing helps so here I am again. I make no promises but I will try and let my mind ramble here uncensored.

Music

2008-04-02T16:40:00.001+02:00

When your feeling funky

just for Fun

2008-03-26T02:38:00.001+01:00

Winter Blues

2008-02-24T04:15:00.003+01:00

When will this white stuff stop falling from the sky? I am beginning to hate winter. I never used to but I am old and I guess I can learn new things. One thing I have learned is I hate WINTER.
Maybe I just miss the warmth of the sun or maybe I miss the sound of the waves crashing on the shore or maybe I miss the smell of barbecue whatever the reasons I HATE WINTER!
OK just in case you missed it let me make it perfectly clear, say it with me, I HATE WINTER.
Thank you.

The new year

2008-01-28T02:38:00.001+01:00

The transion to 2008 was very hard and extremely hectic. Family struggles, work troubles and personal struggles have dominated the new year to date. I guess things can only get better. My world has been turned upside down! Some hjas been my doing , but some has been out of my control. It is hard getting back nto the swing of posting but I will work to stay focused and post three to four times a week.

Father's Day

2007-06-17T23:36:00.000+02:00

Here it is, father's day and I am sad. Sad because My old man is dead and gone. I am amazed how many things I learned from my old man, things I didn't even know I learned until bang there it was. My dad was not really old but I was really young and what does a young man know about life? He did whatever he needed to do for his family. He worked hard, drank harder and rarely played but when he did he played hardest of all.
I learned right from wrong, truth and compassion from my old man. He taught me to be fair and watch out for those who couldn't watch out for themselves. I never had to wonder if my old man loved me. He loved us all even when we hated him. No strings attached to his love.
Some dad's are not so loving. I thank goodness that I had a dad who was.
My son and daughter called me today to wish me a happy father's day and I felt great.
Have you called your Dad? Do it now.

Tired of living? It's easy to do.

2007-06-05T05:28:00.000+02:00

Wild horses couldn't drag me away from you. I look forward to each and every day knowing you are there. How lucky am I? Things are good even when they suck. I don't need a magician to know my future is bright.

Memorial Day

2007-05-28T18:32:00.000+02:00

Remember all those in our country's service especially those in harms way.

happy Mother's Day

2007-05-13T18:05:00.000+02:00

Hi Mom, Have a great Mother's day.
Have you called your Mother today to tell her how much she means to you?
Do it now!

The Rockettes

2007-05-04T14:15:00.000+02:00

I have some wonderful memories of Radio City Music Hall. I was 8 or 9 when My family brought us to see the Christmas spectacular and I was amazed at all that I saw. Animals and people on stage and the whole Christmas theme just blew my mind. Then the "Rockettes" came on stage and that was all she wrote! They were and continue to be just beyond words. Their costumes and their precision are something to behold. My favorite was always the march of the wooden soldiers. Watching them fall one by one was a sight to behold and one that remains with me to this day.
My family went to the Easter show a few years later but that first visit is the one I will always remember.
When my children were about the same age we took them to witness the spectacular for themselves and I was able to witness the wonder all over again thru their eyes. My children are grown now but we still talk about the Spectacular from time to time especially around Christmas and Easter.
I was listening to NPR yesterday and heard that there are auditions for the Rockettes yesterday and call backs today. Good luck to all those who dream of becoming a "Rockettes".

R and R

2007-04-27T03:12:00.000+02:00

Oh my goodness how I need some rest and relaxation! The world is going way too fast and I just need to get off for a short time. You know how it is sometimes you just want to veg and slide into another reality. I need to just not think for awhile. So until my brain kicks back into think mode I am gone.

Here comes the Sun

2007-04-19T17:07:00.000+02:00

Today as I walked ouside I chanced to look up and there it was, right there where it belongs doing what it does best. Yes the Sun was shinning brightly and I could feel it's warmth on my otherwise cold face. to quote the beatles "little darling it feels like a long cold lonely winter, it feels like years since you've been here". Welcome back I missed you!

In Memoriam

2007-04-19T02:08:00.000+02:00

I want to extend my deepest sympathies to the students and families of Virginia Tech.

Rainy day

2007-04-17T03:27:00.000+02:00

The world has gone crazy! Weather, seasons, and people all crazy!

Blogs Unite Against Iraq War

2007-04-16T16:18:00.001+02:00

"One Million Blogs for Peace" movement began on Iraq War's fourth anniversary with 217 blogs. They hope to have 1,000,000 strong by the fifth anniversary.

read more | digg story

Easter

2007-04-06T17:26:00.000+02:00

Easter is almost here and I hope everyone has a safe and happy Holiday.
May the chocolate bunnies and the jelly beans be calorie free and may you Easter eggs be as colorful as the rainbow.
If you remember pause a moment as think of those serving our country to preserve our freedoms.

I -vs- We

2007-04-06T17:08:00.000+02:00

Language can be confusing at times. Have you ever listened to someone who was responding to a question that you thought had a simple answer and were shocked to learn it was not so simple after all? What about trying to get answer to who was responsible for something? I have noticed the all of a sudden I begin to hear a very passive "we" instead of "I".
I struggle we responsibility at times, we( see I did it here) all do for many different reasons but in general I do own what I do. How easy it is to use the passive "we" to hide ourselves when confronted with our actions. I was listening to Public radio today and almost every politician used "we" instead of I when answering questions of any kind, never mind the questions asking who was at fault. It seems the only time our elected officials use "I" is when they want our vote and then it seems they lose the "I" and go back to the "we" after the election.
Now that the 2008 presidential election has started I will be interested in how those seeking election choose their words. Will they use I or we? Time will tell and we have almost a year and a half until the election.

A day of rest and a day of work

2007-03-26T02:21:00.000+02:00

Sundays have always been a day to sleep in and then have brunch with friends. My parents were not much on Brunch. As a kid I had to go to church at 8am each Sunday or there would be hell to pay Monday when the nuns would ask why I was absent. Believe me there was no good answer to that question.
After Mass my mom would cook breakfast for all of us. Eggs, bacon, sausage, rolls, butter and assorted jams and jellies coffee for my dad and mom, the kids got milk. The conversation was very brief and usually restricted to sports. Dad was a Yankee fan. A big Yankee fan! So as you might guess I am a huge Yankee fan.
When I was young we spent the day pouring over the newspaper my parents reading the news and my siblings and I reading the funny pages. Then the games would come on the radio and after 1959 TV. We also went to Yankee stadium many a Sunday to watch the Yankees play ball. Most Sundays mom would head to the kitchen to begin Sunday supper as we watched the game. Soon the whole apartment would begin to smell great. I would become distracted by the cooking and wander into the kitchen and help mom peel potatoes and watch as she made bread. As a reward I would get to lick the bowl after she made a cake or some other sweet thing.
I remember my parents having parties with music and dancing. Singing songs from the old country, mostly Irish, sung by men with the sweetest voices I have ever heard. When I was around 12 or 13 guests asked me to sing a song for them and I sang a German song that my mom used to sting as I grew up and I loved. There were lots of kids at the parties and we all sang or danced the entire night. Music was always part of the parties and always sung live by friends and family. These were my first concerts, my first music heroes. I never learned to play an instrument and have always envied those who could. I will sing every once in a great while more for my own enjoyment than those who listen.

Blogs for Peace

2007-03-24T22:38:00.000+01:00

If you have a blog please join the growing list here. One million blogs for peace.

Those were the days

2007-03-24T02:52:00.000+01:00

My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs and spread mayo on the same cutting board with the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem to get food poisoning.
My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter AND I used to eat it raw sometimes, too. Our school sandwiches were wrapped in wax paper in a brown paper bag, not in icepack coolers, but I can't remember getting e-coli.
Speaking of school, we all said prayers and sang the national anthem, and staying in detention after school caught all sorts of negative attention.
We must have had horribly damaged psyches. What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school nurses? Ours was a Nun.

We played 'king of the hill' on piles of snow left by the Sanitation Department, and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out the 48-cent bottle of Mercurochrome (kids liked it better because it didn't sting like iodine did) and then we got our butt spanked.
Now it's a trip to the emergency room, followed by a 10-day dose of a $49 bottle of antibiotics, and then Mom calls the attorney to sue the City for leaving a horribly vicious pile of snow where it was such a threat.

To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been told that they were from a dysfunctional family. How could we possibly have known that?

How did we ever survive?

St. Patricks Day

2007-03-18T02:50:00.000+01:00

May the Irish hills caress you.
May her lakes and rivers bless you.
May the luck of the Irish enfold you.
May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you.

I wanna be sedated

2007-03-16T06:51:00.000+01:00

Ever get the feeling. It creeps up on you from time to time. One minute your fine then BAM! I wanna be sedated, I want to leave the real world far behind. Wouldn't it be nice. The Ramones had the right idea.

Ten Years After - I'm Going Home (live Woodstock '69)

2007-03-16T06:40:00.000+01:00

When I got my orders to "go home" My buddies paid some band to play this song for me. The band did a horrible job but hell I was heading back HOME. I was so happy I cried like a baby. Enough said.

Edmund Fitzgerald

2007-03-16T06:39:00.000+01:00

Gordon Lightfoot at his best.

Taking It to the Streets

2007-03-16T06:34:00.000+01:00

Remember when?

Days of my Youth

2007-03-16T06:27:00.000+01:00

I would listen to Neil Young for hours at a time. I always felt kinda depressed, go figure. I still love his songs and that voice.

Tribute to the Beatles

2007-03-16T06:19:00.000+01:00

The greastest band of all time? What do you think?

Pink Floyd

2007-03-16T06:14:00.000+01:00

Time

Home Safety

2007-03-16T05:54:00.000+01:00

You must see this! This is very scary.

Spring Time

2007-03-16T02:53:00.000+01:00

Just when I was starting to think that old man winter was a thing of the past, Bam!
Tomorrows forecast calls for snow and the day after more snow. They say 12 inches when all is said and done. Someone shoot me quick and bury me somewhere sunny,warm and I will be happy!
Here comes the sun... my ass. Here comes that mean old man winter back again making life a little bit harder. Oh well what can you do? Accept the things you can't change and move on.

Blue Grass

2007-03-14T01:20:00.000+01:00

1952 Vincent Black Lightning

The year I was born.

A Visit to Smith College

2007-03-14T00:11:00.000+01:00

Smith is having their Blub show this week and I thought I would take a peek at the colorful flowers since I am sick and tired of grey and that nasty dirty snow color. I was more than pleased by the colorful flowers. I am ready for Spring to arrive and wash away all this nasty grey snow.

Just a few of the many flowers.If you are near to North Hampton Mass. Drop in to the Smith college Greenhouse. You will be glad you did.

Patti Smith

2007-03-10T03:43:00.000+01:00

Patti Smith "You Light Up My Life" on "Kids Are People Too"
Unbelievable!

Missing the point

2007-03-07T20:26:00.000+01:00

Protesters unlikely to get day in court
By BOB AUDETTE, Reformer Staff

Tuesday, March 6
BRATTLEBORO -- If protesters who unfurled a "SHUT VY" banner Monday morning at Entergy's headquarters are hoping to get their day in court, they are sadly mistaken.
That was the sentiment expressed by State's Attorney Dan Davis, after the four anti-nuclear protesters were cited by the Brattleboro Police Department for unlawful trespass.

Davis has said in the past -- which he reaffirmed Monday afternoon -- that he has no plans to let the protesters use the overloaded court system as their political soapbox.

"Although it's going down, we have a backlog in our criminal case load in district court," said Davis. It's inappropriate, he said, for the protesters to use the courts as "another forum to make a political statement."

The four -- Elizabeth Wood and Daniel Sicken of Dummerston, Jane Newton of Londonderry and John Ward of Gill, Mass. -- were cited for unlawful trespass, said Lt. Robert Kirkpatrick, the day-shift commander for the local police.

At just past 6 a.m. Monday, the Brattleboro Police Department received a call that people, using ladders, were on the roof.

"We take that seriously," said Kirkpatrick. The four protesters who

hung the banner were arrested and cited for unlawful trespass.
Four police officers responded to the scene, he said, adding all four protesters were arrested without incident.

In the past, anti-nuclear protesters who have been arrested and cited for a variety of infractions -- including trespass and disorderly conduct -- have had their charges quietly dismissed prior to any court dates.

Davis said no action would be taken against seven people who chained themselves to the front gate of the Vermont Yankee nuclear power plant Jan. 23. He said he didn't anticipate that any action would be taken against the four arrested Monday either.

"I'm not going to say there won't be any action taken in the future," said Davis, but based on the facts of these two events, he wouldn't be taking any of the 11 to court.

In October, protesters attempted to unfurl a similar banner, but were unable to get it hung before police arrived.

"I'm not concerned about whether they charge us and take us to court," Wood said, adding that some protesters would use their court dates as an opportunity to speak against the relicensing.

"But I want to get the message out to all the people in Vermont and our state legislators," she said. "Maybe those people up north don't know how we are feeling down here. Hopefully this will help tell them."

"What I am aiming for with civil disobedience is to make the issue more visible around the state," said Wood, who added that most local legislators have let it be known that they are not happy with the relicensing of the power plant.

"We are getting the message across," said Deb Katz, of Citizen Awareness Network, which has helped organize and support protests in the past. She said the unfurling of the banner was just one in a series of actions "to continue to make it clear that this reactor has to shut down."

Katz said the chaining of the protesters and the unfurling of the banner are efforts to raise awareness around the state about the relicensing of the power plant.

"The issue hasn't been on people's radar," she said.

"This sends a strong message," said Sicken. "We feel the plant should be shut down. Why not hang a big banner across the place where all the top executives are allowing this to happen."

Because the regulatory processes that are in place "cannot be counted on to shut down Vermont Yankee," Wood wrote in an e-mail announcing the protest. It's important for people like here to keep awareness at a heightened level.

"I simply don't know what else to do," wrote Newton, in the e-mail. "Right now we are hoping to persuade our Vermont legislature to vote against extending the life of Vermont Yankee for 20 more terrifying years, but the powers of giant corporations are beyond belief and I can't trust our politicians to do the right thing."

Katz said legislators have a chance to both shut down a polluting industry and make Vermont a pioneer in clean energy, "something that their grandchildren will be proud of."

"There is the possibility the Legislature will pass a green energy portfolio this session," said Katz. "Legislators need to think creatively and they need to be accountable."

"If there is no strong public outcry many legislators will see continuing to operate VY as the most expedient solution to Vermont's future energy demand," Wood wrote in her e-mail.

Entergy, which owns and operates the power plant, is in the process of asking the Nuclear Regulatory Commission to extend Vermont Yankee's operating license from 2012 to 2032. The company recently received approval to increase its power output by 20 percent.

This was never about a day in court! This was and continues to always be about shutting down Vermont Yankee Nuclear Power Plant! Keep up the good work.
This is a sad commentary about how the news is reported here in Brattleboro Vermont

Lost

2007-03-07T00:49:00.000+01:00

Ricky Ricardo, not the Cuban band leader, was my first best friend. If you were to ask me how we became fast friends I couldn't tell you but we were when I was 11 years old. Ricky was from the Philippines and caught a lot of shit from people because he looked different from some people. To me he was Ricky nothing more or nothing less. We were always together so when people would pick on him they would pick on me. We always had each others back. The streets of New York City could be dangerous but when you had a friend like Ricky you didn’t worry. Ricky and his family moved away after his father died and I lost a true friend to the ever expanding world. I ran into him about 9 years later in Southeast Asia. It appears we were still watching each others back without even knowing it.
I seem to attract some interesting people as friends. Misfits, freaks, lost souls and at times crazy folks would somehow latch onto to me and become friends. Sometimes I didn’t mind but sometimes I just wasn’t their friend and no matter what they were steadfastly mine. I could never be mean to someone on purpose so little by little they kind of grew on me and then somehow became friends. I wouldn't stand people making fun of folks who couldn't defend themselves. Mean people really do suck. We all know someone like that. The person who feels better when they can make someone else feel really bad. I fought many a fight in an attempt to end the injustice but in the end I lost many, the only thing I was able to accomplish is to show those people who had befriended me what it was like to have a real friend.
Maybe that was enough, maybe not. I guess only they can answer that question. I was never one of the misfits but if I were I hope I could have found a friend who was true.

Condoms

2007-03-03T16:03:00.000+01:00

Beware Caution proceed at your own risk.....

Pub Manix Interdite aux moins de 16 ans
Uploaded by yom_

Turn and face the change

2007-02-23T03:55:00.000+01:00

Today is the last day I will post work related things here I will only use this blog to talk about me and the things that I find important or of interest to me.
For the continuing saga of my job visit here http://crisisinmylife.blogspot.com

Aggression

2007-02-22T13:57:00.000+01:00

Aggression scares the crap out of most of us, any kind of aggression. Verbal, physical and psychological aggression is what we encounter each and every day on each and every shift. We attempt to teach staff how to handle aggression in terms of maintaining safety for others and ourselves. Yet we, ourselves, sometimes can never find a way to confront aggression in a way that makes us feel comfortable.
Aggression brings up all kinds of feelings for us. Most of which are fear and pain based making intervening at times problematic at the very least.
Now we must face our own fear when dealing with out of control or escalating people before we can help them to regain control. That is what we do day in and day out.

School's out

2007-02-20T01:30:00.000+01:00

Last year at this time Work seemed crazed and you know what, It is still crazed. The energy level is high in the kids and very low with staff. This is a very bad combination. We will try and have things to do but as always crisis is what drive the unit. We will keep our eyes and ears open to the earliest signs of impending crisis and cut it off at the pass so to speak.
Stayed tuned for the continuing saga.

For You

2007-02-14T17:02:00.000+01:00

Enjoy the song and know it is for you FM.
Happy Valentine's Day

http://pcdon.com/-NatKingCole-TheVeryThoughtOfYou.wav

Something for you Lovers

2007-02-14T16:56:00.000+01:00

Enjoy

Be Mine

2007-02-14T16:46:00.000+01:00

Happy Valentine's Day!
Happy cold, wet, snowy Valentine's Day. Beat down the winter drab and wear red, lots and lots of red. Greet your valentine with smiles and laughter, make your own sun. No valentine? No big deal. Do something special for yourself. Do something for someone else. Today is all about loving and being loved. Pass it around. Have only positive interactions with everyone you meet today. Yes even with the ones you don't like as a matter of fact especially with the people you don't like.

Old man winter is getting feisty. I suspect we are facing retribution for all those warm December and January days. Revenge is best served cold, and baby it's cold outside!

Just once I would like a phone call which says, "grab your passport we have an evening flight to...". It happens all the time in the movies. I wish just once it would happen to me.

What are we thinking

2007-02-11T06:40:00.000+01:00

What a wild week work was! The place felt completely insane. We struggled to maintain safety each day of the week and we did the best we could yet we lost once or twice along the way. We, the staff, were kicked, punched and assaulted verbally each and every day. I don't know how we do the job we do and more importantly I don't know why we keep coming to work?
I am glad my co-workers do come to work. I could not do this without them. We got through another week and we will begin again tomorrow.

Vermont

2007-02-09T03:04:00.000+01:00

Check out this page

http://www.angelfire.com/vt/republicvt/

The Hands have it

2007-02-08T17:39:00.000+01:00

check it out

Sometimes out of the haze

2007-02-07T00:30:00.000+01:00

Sometimes snatches of forgotten events bubble to the surface, and I grab hold.

I remember my one schoolyard fight and being hauled in front of the principal, a mean Nun, Sister David. My explanation was filled with righteous indignation as I was defending a friend, and the guy bothering her deserved to be hit way harder than I could have possibly hit him. I was ten. The principal agreed, to my amazement, though she thought my technique needed a bit of refining.

If I close my eyes, my mind can bring me back to places far away in distance and time. I remember what each of our apartments looked like and can walk the rooms. For eight years the way to school never changed and each house, each landmark became frozen in my memories. Some houses no longer exist, the store fronts and the old ladies looking out the windows have been gone a long time, but I remember my walk exactly as it was. I visited my old neighborhood awhile back and although things change some things never do. The walk to my grade school is exactly as it was some forty five years ago.

The first movie which scared me was The House on Haunted Hill with Vincent Price. When the skeleton comes out of the screen, I darn near pooped my pants.

I love the fun of remembering.

Super Sunday

2007-02-04T13:55:00.000+01:00

Let me say this, "any sunday that I am not working is a super Sunday". All I need is some friends and time off to make the world a happy place. I hope your world is happy and safe this Super Sunday. Watch out for those football fans as they drive home after a few too many drinks.
As the saying goes, "Be careful out there".
Remember somebody loves you and love them right back as much as you can.

"You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone."

2007-02-03T06:20:00.000+01:00

When I was a kid, I liked being in school on dark, snowy days like today. The lights always seemed to make the room feel cozy, and the sound of the muffled wheels was so soothing that everyone seemed to speak in hushed tones, not wanting to spoil the mood. We'd stay inside during recess, and the nun, Sister Raymond, would allow us to walk around the room after lunch to talk with our friends. Girls talked to girls and boys talked to boys. That was the way it was back then.

It wasn't until around the seventh grade that boys could muster enough courage to speak publicly with a girl, and even then it was mostly teasing, the first step into the mysteries of a female-male relationship. In the eighth grade the first of our couples emerged, and the rest of us boiled over with curiosity and a bit of jealousy. We asked for and got all the details, it being just too big to be kept secret. Besides, being the first girl to be in a couple was too huge not to flaunt. She told us, with the voice of experience, about handholding and kissing. We were floored.

But within a short time awe was replaced by ordinary as couple after couple began to emerge. The floodgates of adolescence had been opened by one boy brave enough to ask one girl to the movies who was brave enough to say yes.

I would never want to relive those years, I am still traumatized by both the catholic school era of my life as well as the early exploration of relationships with girls.

Punxsutawney Phil

2007-02-03T04:40:00.000+01:00

On each Feb. 2, thousands of people descend on Punxsutawney, a town of 6,100 people about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh, to celebrate what had essentially been a German superstition. The Germans believed that if a hibernating animal, in this case one named Phil, cast a shadow Feb. 2 — the Christian holiday of Candlemas — winter would last another six weeks. If no shadow was seen, legend said spring would come early.

Phil did not see his shadow this morning which means folks can expect an early spring instead of six more weeks of winter.

The snow started falling a few hours ago and the forcast is for 5 or 6 inches to fall. Punxsutawney can keep the Damn Rat!

Sunday

2007-01-28T17:41:00.000+01:00

Sundays are always a sleepy day for me, it is day four of a five day stretch at work and if I am lucky all will be smooth and I will not be sought out by 9 adolescents to help them feel better about one thing or another. Theses things don't mean much to me but to them it is a matter of life and death. As I am reminded from time to time it's not about me.

New Day, Same Insanity

2007-01-25T00:01:00.000+01:00

Well here we are mid week and things are beginning to look and feel better. We all pulled together to ensure every one's safety. Those we serve have begun to deal with their "stuff" in a better manner mostly talking and not acting out. Staff have been able to get more help in the last few days. Management has put an extra staff on to help deal with the needs of those we serve as well as the needs of those of us who work here.
We are in the middle of so many changes and we are all trying to keep our heads above the water. I feel less overwhelmed yet I am still overwhelmed.

A visit to Hell

2007-01-24T04:25:00.000+01:00

This past weekend was pure hell at work. Staff did all that was humanly possible to maintain the safety of those we serve and ourselves. After repeated calls to the police and medical staff, they were able to get the unit under control and since then each day things have gotten a bit better yet the stress has been overwhelming to all the staff involved. We have called out once or twice and put further stress on ourselves and co-workers.
What do you do when you feel like there is nothing left to do?
How can you help when you are overwhelmed and over stressed?
Where can you find relief from the trauma of your job?
We attempt to pull together and keep dignity and respect first in all of our dealing with those we serve and as importantly those we work with.
We were able to get past all the incidents without anyone getting hurt physically alas emotional pain is harder to recover from sometimes.
We are all helpers who will not allow ourselves to be helped!

Days gone by

2007-01-22T04:46:00.000+01:00

My son and I went to Cooperstown to visit the Baseball hall of fame this weekend. We had a great time there and the drive afforded us time to talk about stuff. We had visited the Hall of fame back in 1995 and he remembered a movie that they showed and sure enough it was still there. The show was different but we had a good time all the same and we decided we would go again in a few years. As we spoke of our first visit I was surprised to hear how fondly he recalled the trip and how much he remembered. He was 5 years old at the time and his sister was also with us. We spent a long weekend at Howe Caverns and the Baseball hall of fame and we had a great time. I found pictures of the trip and I was amazed to see how young both of them were. He is going to be 17 in April and she will be 22 in May.
It was truly amazing to revisit through my sons eyes and memories. This is good, this is very good.

Weekends

2007-01-14T22:54:00.000+01:00

Weekends are so short yet at the same time they can last an eternity. When you work Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday with folks that need constant supervision and care you begin to feel empty. I have one day off before I have to go back and face the onslaught of neediness and anger. PTSD is something real and it creeps up on you without you realizing. How does one change staffing patterns to prevent people from becoming traumatized.
A day a week off does not make for a healthy work environment! Stay tuned for updates on this matter. I would be interested to hear any thoughts on this also.

Support

2007-01-13T05:06:00.000+01:00

Work was a bit on the crazed side this evening yet we were able to get through the evening without anyone getting hurt or hurting themselves. My co-workers were excellent as usual and made interventions that much easier. We once again were able to support each other and go home feeling positive about what we do.
I believe everyone hates when they feel threatened and those we serve threaten when they feel unsafe. Knowing this helps but one still feels anxious when threatened.
Trauma and stress can be overwhelming sometimes. It is nice to know we can count on one another in times of crisis.

Winter blues

2007-01-12T17:38:00.000+01:00

Well looks like winter is still missing in action yet the temperature is beginning to drop. The weather people say we may get some snow next week but you never know.
One can still be blue though and alas I am there! I have always been a bit down during the winter months, a little "SAD" perhaps. Life has changed so much for me in the last few months. I feel like I have be on a long journey and just now returned to myself. I have been very emotional lately and find I am close to tears often. I avoid the radio as the songs can trigger a tear fest. I do my best to stay focused and busy but the best laid plans go right down the drain sometimes.
My son and I have a trip to the Baseball Hall of Fame planned for the end of the month and I look forward to the trip with him. We have not been there in 8 or 9 years so it will be fun.
My daughter is coming back from Ireland this weekend and heading back to school so I will be able to chat more often than the last three weeks. A college senior now I often wonder where the years have gone since I first held her in my arms as a new born?

Time marches forward

2007-01-09T19:42:00.000+01:00

Time may change but those I work for surely do not. Today promises to be an emotionally driven evening at work. My co-workers and myself will have our hands full maintaining the safety of all. That is what we do, we co-manage.
11 teen girls, each one looking to have their needs met. Without basic needs being met it is impossible to from healthy relationships. Without healty relationships we can not help co-manage. The cycle continues. The year is new and we are filled with hope.

The winter that never was

2007-01-09T19:36:00.000+01:00

OK so what ever happened to winter? Have we finally screwed things up so badly that we went and destroyed an entire season? I feel badly for the polar bears but believe me I feel even worse for us. I don't love winter but I absolutly hate summer and we seem to be heading for hotter summers and warmer winters.
Way to go.......
Stock up on some spf 150.

New Year, Old crap

2007-01-05T19:39:00.000+01:00

Whoever said, "what a difference a day makes", was so wrong. Some things never change and although I am hopeful that things will change as of today nothing has changed. Life goes on but time appears to be standing still none the less.
Why do I feel like I am caught in an episode of the " Twilight Zone"?
Damn it's not even cold and it's January in Vermont!
Stay tuned for updates.

Happy New Year

2007-01-01T05:12:00.000+01:00

May the new year year bring you happiness and good health.

Good night All

2006-12-26T04:12:00.000+01:00

Good Night Bisoux! Sleep well, dream well and stay safe. Tomorrow brings a whole new day to enjoy and explore!

Christmas

2006-12-26T04:04:00.000+01:00

I hope your Christmas was a happy one filled with love and peace. People who you love and care for at your side make the day even better.
My life is new once again this holiday season and it is like experiencing it for the first time. I feel like a little kid with wide eyes filled with wonder and joy.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.

Happy Christmas Merry New Year

2006-12-24T15:03:00.000+01:00

I'm sitting on a couch; I've just made a new friend. Bisoux is his name. He's a six month-old cat and seems to have befriended me. Isn't that what the holiday season is about--finding new friends, reconnecting with old friends, and remembering all we have to be happy about?

Happy Christmas, Healthy New Year to all.

Free Hugs

2006-12-15T03:48:00.000+01:00

Free Hugs in Korea. A good idea is universal! A hug by any other name is still a Hug.

Is it ending or beginning?

2006-12-14T18:02:00.000+01:00

Ever get the felling your not sure if things are at an ending or just beginning? My life is about to change and I am a ball of emotions. One moment I am fine and the next I am sobbing uncontrollably. I want to move on yet I am frightened to move on. I can't stay so I face my fear and move on with my life. I leave more than twenty years behind and I will try to keep as much of those years as I can. I have much to be happy for but to feel that happiness may take some time.
Divorce is a rough road to trod, there are so many things that get in the way yet move forward is what I must do. I am truly blessed with friends who are there to help and not judge. I do enough of that all by myself.
A wise person once said,"shit happens". Well it sure does, and most of the time we make it happen.
I feel a wave of melancholia sweeping over me so I am going to stop for today.
May your holidays be peaceful and happiness be yours.

Let it begin

2006-12-08T23:23:00.000+01:00

The devil made me do it.

http://www.mesasoftware.com/merrychristmas.htm

As the year ends

2006-12-07T20:34:00.000+01:00

It's hard to believe it is almost the end of 2006. Where has the time gone? This would be a good time to look over the past year and see just how I did.
Well maybe not. The last year has been a whirlwind of activity both good and not so good and if I look closely at the past year I think some people would say it was a very bad year. I on the other hand would offer a different outlook to my year and say that although it was very hard it was a good year for me. Part of my life came crashing down around me and another part was released to see the light of day after many long years of being hidden away from the world. I have grown and become much more gentle in my thoughts and actions.I have been able to push past sterotypes and lables and accept people for who they are and not see anything but that. It was and continues to be a rocky road to travel but I wouldn't miss it for the world.
I will post more on this topic.

Snow

2006-12-04T15:58:00.000+01:00

By the way there was a sprinkling of snow this morning. It did not stick to anything but it is the first white stuff so far.
Can winter be far behind?

Holidays

2006-12-04T15:46:00.000+01:00

This is a crazy time if the year for me. In the rush to complete gift purchasing people oft tiems become crazed! They push and shove to get that special item that they just have to have. They scream at salespeople, like that will make inventory change, and at times attempt to take things right out of other peoples hands.
All in the name of Christmas, Oh my!
Where did the spirit of Christmas go?
When did we lose it?
What are we teaching our children about the meaning of Christmas?
Now there is a good question for us all, What does Christmas mean to each of us?

I think we need to be more like Scrooge and remember to keep Christmas in our hearts every day of the year.

As Tiny Tim said," bless us all , every one"

Here comes the sun

2006-12-02T20:23:00.000+01:00

The sun has graced us today with it's presence. So I thought some music to celebrate all the good things today has brought.
Feels like snow in the air! I am ready for whatever Mother has in store today.

Purple Haze

2006-12-02T20:21:00.000+01:00

Video quality is poor but Audio is pure magic.

All along the watchtower

2006-12-02T20:16:00.000+01:00

Hendrix - Wild Thing

2006-12-02T20:15:00.000+01:00

Wild thing....

Jimi Hendrix

2006-12-02T20:11:00.000+01:00

Give a listen to, in my opinion, the greatest performers of all time.

Rainy day

2006-12-01T20:58:00.000+01:00

Fridays are something to look forward to usually but when you work the weekend Friday just becomes another day to get through. It has been damp and now it is raining, what a gloomy day it is.
The unit has been through hell in the last few weeks and We all could use a break in the action. I am feeling overwhelmed and each incident only makes things worse for me. I am glad to work with good people who are all looking for the same thing. Safety and diginity for everyone, Staff and those we serve.

Thanksgiviing Redux

2006-11-29T20:31:00.000+01:00

If only I had found this last week.
Talk about turkeys!

Thelonious Monk In Berlin 1973

2006-11-29T20:21:00.000+01:00

Listens so easy.

Thelonious Monk - Blue Monk - Oslo, April 1966

2006-11-29T20:18:00.000+01:00

Here is some more Jazz from YouTube.
Enjoy

Awesome video performance...must see!

2006-11-29T13:43:00.000+01:00

Cirque de Soleil.....
This is amazing!It is a bit long but worth every second.

jerome murat
Uploaded by segalier

Feeling kinda blue

2006-11-28T20:17:00.000+01:00

Tuesday and the rain is falling,
not hard, but just enough.
No sunshine, no warmth, no kidding...

Tuesday and the sky is falling,
hit me smack on the head.
No kidding, no sunshine, no warmth...

Tuesday and my spirit is falling,
I watched it slip away.
No warmth, no kidding, no sunshine

How does the song go?

"There ain't no sunshine when your gone"

That's it for today........

Jazz

2006-11-28T20:16:00.001+01:00

Enjoy

Time ( like rust ) never sleeps

2006-11-28T03:56:00.000+01:00

I would love for time to just stop, not forever just when I am enjoying myself. I rarely enjoy things these days. So when I can I do with all my heart and soul. Life can be a harsh task master yet life also holds some amazing surprises. We should just enjoy the great things and try not to let the crap burden us for too long a time.
Time may be on my side but time is not fair.
I seem to have lost my point here so I am just going to take a time out.

Tick... Tick... Tick

2006-11-24T18:48:00.000+01:00

The count really starts. Is that ticking I hear?

I hope you all have peaceful holidays. It's always a challenge. It's not about the stuff, it's about each other.

Black Friday

2006-11-24T18:41:00.000+01:00

What has become of the spirit of holidays? It seems lately each holiday is just a reason to start shopping for the next. Have we forgotten what the holiday is all about? I sometimes forget. Sometimes it just feels like a bother, everyone wants something else and find inf a consensus of what to do is impossible. What ever happened to celebrating with family?
I love my extended family but would it be too much to ask to spend time with the immediate family. Spouses, kids, pets, we all have phones why don't we use them.
Black Friday indeed, I'm depressed, I wonder how many others are also.

Thanksgiving

2006-11-22T23:07:00.000+01:00

After the feast is over and we are all complaining about how much we just ate, remember all you have to be thankful for.
For me it is family, friends and the fact that I am still here, healthy and not too feeble minded.

Happy Thanksgiving

The Humanity of it all

2006-11-19T01:05:00.000+01:00

Once again weekends are a time of high crisis with those we serve, police were called, staff were hurt and yet staff did what they could to maintain safety. I think that sometimes management does not use their head when it comes to the combination of staff working. Per Diem's and float staff with a regular unit staff is a recipe to disaster, and that is exactly what happened. Luckily the regular staff was able to get things back close to normal by 1:30 am. Moral is close to being non-existent and staff is near to exhausted. We walk around feeling traumatized
and not at all supported. I am not sure how long this can go on until the place falls apart completely.
We, unit staff, all are struggling with building good working relationships with each other and when we don't work on a regular basis it makes building relations close to impossible.
Diginity and respect is taking a beating between staff, some are frightened and others are close to burn out.

Planning

2006-11-15T17:49:00.000+01:00

Nothing goes well unless there is some sort of plan. We have a plan for everything we do every minute of every day. We may not be conscience of the plan but believe me there is one. When We attempt to intervene with others we had better have a plan and that plan needs to be clearly communicated.
When I encounter a Behavioral Crisis I go to the team and figure out a plan to help the individual maintain Safety, by getting the persons input on what will help we have a much better chance of success. There is usually time to do this, but when there isn't then Safety is paramount. EVERYONE's safety! Trauma happens to each and everyone of us. We often look a those we serve but rarely look at ourselves or our co-workers.
Well I am looking. I have become vocal to co-workers and management on how I have been traumatized by the Behavioral Crisis on the Unit. I want to be part of the solution that will make our job safer for both those served and those I work with. I think the first step is to admit how I feel.

Trauma

2006-11-14T16:15:00.000+01:00

I find it takes longer to recover emotionally from being traumatized. I feel sad and depressed a little longer, it takes longer to smile. Time is the thing that heals. When I am traumatized I feel as though I do not have time so I push this all inside when I know I need to talk about these things. What will I do for my emotional health? Why is it so hard to do things for oneself?
Here is where I seek out my friends. Smiling faces is a very good medicine, and I am going to get my prescription filled.
This sounds so hokey.

Dignity and Respect

2006-11-14T15:52:00.000+01:00

Last night at work was very hard indeed. Some of the residents were struggling with safety issues and just could not maintain their safety. The entire shift was focused on these residents while the staff kept the program running at the same time. Nine residents did their best to maintain a positive attitude in the face of yelling and screaming and general trauma inflicting goings on. Staff once again stepped up and did their best to help those acting out with dignity and respect when those we serve were anything but dignified or respectful. Staff were hurt, staff and peers were re traumatized, it took a lot of work to deescalate the ones in behavioral crisis and also to ground those that were traumatized by the behaviors of their peers. The staff I work with continue to show creativity in how to help those not in crisis and compassion with those who are in crisis. Without compassionate co-workers this job would be a thing of the past. Building healthy working relationships with my co-workers is the only way to be able to do this job.
We, the staff, move forward after each crisis having learned a little more about those we serve yet more importantly we learn a little bit more about each other.
I am always reminded that there is a process and we have to trust that process.

we should never forget

2006-11-12T04:08:00.000+01:00

Why I wear a poppy
Chris Corrigan
Parking lot

“We all fight on two fronts, the one facing the enemy and the one facing what we do to the enemy.”
– Joseph Boyden, Three Day Road, p. 301

I wish I could find a more coherent way to talk about this, about the complex set of emotions I feel in wearing a poppy and believing in peace. .....

Rememberance Day is coming and I choose to remember the men and women that I am paying to fight in Afghanistan. I am not a friend of war, and especially not a friend of this one, and I desperately wish for these men and women that if they have to confront these two fronts that it be rather in the service of a better story than the one we are being told about terror. ....

I wear a poppy today to remember those that are caught in these conflicts - the innocents and those we pay - and to remember that when they come home we owe them wholeness and a responsibility to help them heal themselves from the wars that they fight, on both fronts.

Life is a circle, wait and everything will repeat itself

2006-11-12T04:03:00.000+01:00

The Forgotten Wounded of Iraq
Ron Kovic
truthdig

I cannot help but wonder what it will be like for the young men and women wounded in Iraq. What will their homecoming be like? I feel close to them. Though many years separate us we are brothers and sisters. We have all been to the same place. For us in 1968 it was the Bronx veterans hospital paraplegic ward, overcrowded, understaffed, rats on the ward, a flood of memories and images, I can never forget; urine bags overflowing onto the floor. It seemed more like a slum than a hospital. Paralyzed men lying in their own excrement, pushing call buttons for aides who never came, wondering how our government could spend so much money (billions of dollars) on the most lethal, technologically advanced weaponry to kill and maim human beings but not be able to take care of its own wounded when they came home.

Will it be the same for them? Will they have to return to these same unspeakable conditions? Has any of it changed? I have heard that our government has already attempted to cut back millions in much needed funds for veterans hospitals-and this when thousands of wounded soldiers are returning from Iraq. Will they too be left abandoned and forgotten by a president and administration whose patriotic rhetoric does not match the needs of our wounded troops now returning? Do the American people, the president, the politicians, senators and congressmen who sent us to this war have any idea what it really means to lose an arm or a leg, to be paralyzed, to begin to cope with the psychological wounds of that war? Do they have any concept of the long-term effects of these injuries, how the struggles of the wounded are only now just beginning? How many will die young and never live out their lives because of all the stress and myriad of problems that come with sending young men and women into combat?

Veterans Day

2006-11-10T23:05:00.001+01:00

Saturday is Veterans Day! If you know a Vet shake his or her hand and say "thanks", we are the home of the free because of these brave people. Keep our servicemen and servicewomen in your thoughts and your prayers.
Real life hero's each and everyone!

Sick

2006-11-10T21:29:00.000+01:00

I have been sick and getting about has been hard but I was able to keep myself entertained. I sat at the computer and found this. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.

Smile a little smile

2006-11-10T00:54:00.000+01:00

Sometimes you just come find something that breaks you up. This is one of those things. I would expect that hardcore star wars types hate this but it is wicked funny! Enjoy!!

Sick

2006-11-09T02:42:00.000+01:00

I taught today in spite of feeling ill. I am teaching so much lately that I am beginning to feel like a teacher, but wait I am a teacher of sorts. Maybe I should say I am a role model of what I teach. Yes that is much more accurate. I feel strange sometimes when I try and help my co-workers realize that in order to deliver quality care to those we serve we must have good, healthy working relationships with not only those we serve but also with each other. The more I think about it the more I realize that healthy working relationships with my co-workers is the key to quality care. If we can not extend dignity and respect to each other how in the world are we going to show dignity and respect to those we serve?
Why is it we treat each other so badly? We watch each other struggle and yet we rarely reach out to help.
Those we serve witness this and no matter what we say, they understand non-verbals and body language very well. When our mouths say something but our actions say something else, those we serve listen to our deeds not our words.

Feeling kind of lonely

2006-11-08T02:50:00.000+01:00

I have been feeling kind of lonely the last few days and sad. I found this clip and it brought a smile to my face and reminded me that I have friends who make me feel loved.
Sometimes it's not the words but the feelings that say it all.

What the world needs now........

2006-11-06T02:55:00.001+01:00

Can you really say no to a hug!